By trying to avoid these ten common mistakes, not only will you enjoy the process of dating much better, you’re also more likely to meet your perfect match and start a lasting relationship. Remember, life is difficult enough—dating shouldn’t be as well!
Thinking you can ‘fix’ a man’s flaws
Most men—and women—are going to have some imperfections. But you need to decide what flaws you can live with, and what flaws you can’t, because you shouldn’t think you can change a person. If you’re dating someone who has a deal-breaker flaw, then it’s better to call things off than expect you can fix it. Conversely, decide what small flaws you’re able to live with and don’t agonize over them.
Expecting to be spoiled and giving nothing in return
Remember, dating is a two-way street. It’s all well and good if you expect a man to pay for the first date, or if you have traditional values. But dating should also be fun for your partner too! Make sure they’re getting something out of it too—whether you let them pick the movie, or you buy the dessert after the dinner, it’s nice to contribute and keep things level.
Mistaking shared interests for shared values
A lot of people get caught up with discovering their date’s hobbies and interests, and mistakenly think that if these are compatible with their own, then they’ve found a perfect match. But having shared values and lifestyles is actually much more important. It can be hard to discover these things on the first date, so it’s fine to keep it light to start. But as your relationship progresses, make sure you’re aligned in these ways and you’ll be more likely to sustain a lasting bond.
Not having fun
Dating is a serious and important thing, but most of all, it should be fun! If you’re approaching dating like it’s a challenge or a job interview, then you’re likely not going to meet the right person for you. If you try to have fun, you’ll establish a more genuine connection. And if things don’t work out...then you’ve enjoyed yourself in the process! What’s to lose?
Being too self-conscious or second-guessing yourself
Dating can be nerve-wracking, and you’ll probably find yourself analyzing your appearance, personality and sense of self-worth way more when you’re dating than when you’re not. But try to have confidence in yourself, while also being genuine. If you’re nervous, admit to your date that you’re nervous! Be true to who you are, without putting yourself down. You’ll come across as honest, genuine and confident in yourself, which is very appealing.